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Adam and Eve - Believe
Apples and Pears - Stairs
Ascot Races - Braces
Aristotle - Bottle
Almond Rocks - Socks
April Fools - Football Pools
Artful Dodger - Lodger
Auntie Lily - Silly
oOo
Baked Bean - Queen Elizabeth II
Baker's Dozen - Cousin
Ball and Chalk - Walk
Barnaby Rudge - Judge
Barnacle Bills - Testicles
Barnet Fair - Hair
Bees and Honey - Money
Bee's Knees - Business
Bird Lime - Time
Boat Race - Face
Bob Hope - Soap
Bo Peep - Sleep
Bottle Stopper - Copper (Police Officer)
Brahms and Liszt - Pissed (Drunk)
Brass Tacks - Facts
Brassic (Boracic Lint) - Skint
Bread and Honey - Money
Bricks and Mortar - Daughter
Brown Bread - Dead
Butcher's Hook - Look
oOo
Cain and Abel - Table
Canary - Fairy (Gay)
Canoes - Shoes
Captain Cook - Book
Captain Kirk - Work
Cash and Carry - Marry
Cat and Mouse - House
Cat and Dog - Bog (Toilet)
Charlie Brown - Clown
Charlie Dicken - Chicken
Current Bun - Sun
China Plate - Mate
Cockle and Hen - Ten
oOo
Daisy Roots - Boots
Darby and Joan - Moan
Darling Daughter - Water
David Bowie - Blowy (Windy)
Dead Loss - Boss
Desperate Dan - Suntan
Dicky Bird - Word
Dicky Dirt - Shirt
Ding Dong Bell - Hell
Dinky Doos - Shoes
Dog and Bone - Telephone
Dorothy Squires - Tyres
D'Oyly Carte - Fart
Drip Dry - Cry
Duck and Dive - Skive
Duck's Arse - Grass (Informant)
Dudley Moores - Sores
Duke of Kent - Rent
Dunkirk - Work
Dustbin Lids - Kids
oOo
East & West - Vest
Elephant and Castle - Arse Hole
Errol Flynn - Chin
Evening Breeze - Cheese
Everton Toffee - Coffee
Eyes of Blue - True
oOo
Family Tree - Lavatory
Fanny Blair - Hair
Fanny Hill - Pill (Contraceptive)
Fat and Wide - Bride
Fiddle De Dee - Pee / Wee
First Aid Kits - Tits (Breasts)
Fish and Chips - Tips (Gratuities)
Flowery Dell - Cell
Four by Two - Jew
Francis Drakes - Brakes
Frankie Howard - Coward
Frankie Vaughan - Prawn
Fred Astaire - Hair
French Kiss - Piss (Urinate)
Frog & Toad - Road
Frying Pan - Fan
oOo
Gay Gordon - Parking Warden
General Election - Erection (Standing Member)
Geoffrey Chaucer - Saucer
George Bernard Shaw - Door
Ginger Ale - Jail
Girls and Boys - Noise
Glasgow Ranger - Stranger
Glass of Plonk - Conk (Nose)
Glenn Hoddle - Doddle (Simple Task)
Gregory Peck - Cheque
oOo
Half Inch - Pinch (to steal)
Hampstead Heath - Teeth
Holy Ghost - Toast
Hot Cross Bun - Son
Isle of Wight - Light
Itch and Scratch - Match
oOo
Johnny Horner - Corner
Jam Jar - Car
Jam Tart - Heart
Joanna - Piano
Jackanory - Story
Jimmy Riddle - Piddle (Urinate)
Joe Brown - Town
oOo
Khyber Pass - Arse
Kick and Prance - Dance
Kippers - Slippers
Kitchen Sink - Drink
oOo
Lady Godiva - (Fiver) Five Pounds
Laugh and Titter - Bitter (Beer)
Lilley and Skinner - Dinner
Loaf of Bread - Head
Loop the Loop - Soup
oOo
Mince Pies - Eyes
Man on the Moon - Spoon
Mutt and Jeff - Deaf
Mother of Pearl - Girl
North and South - Mouth
Noah's Ark - Lark
oOo
Oily Rag - Fag (Cigarette)
Okey Doke - Poke
One's and Twos - Shoes
Oxford Scholar - Dollar
oOo
Paraffin Lamp - Tramp
Pen and Ink - Stink
Plates of Meat - Feet
oOo
Plink-Plonk - Wine
Pork Chops - Police (Pigs)
Porky Pies - Lies
oOo
Rabbit and Pork - Talk (Rabbit)
Rosie Lee - Tea
Rub-a-dub-dub - Pub
Ruby Murray - Curry
oOo
Sausage and Mash - Cash
Scotch Pegs - Legs
Screw - Prison Officer
Septic Tank - Yank
Skin and Blister - Sister
Syrup and Figs - Wigs
Sky Rocket - Pocket
Snout - Informant
Sweeny Todd - Police (Flying Squad)
oOo
Tea Leaf - Thief
Tiddlywink - Drink
Todd Sloane - On your own (todd)
Tom and Dick - Sick
Trouble and Strife - Wife
oOo
Uncle Ned - Bed
oOo
Vera Lynn - Gin
oOo
Whistle and Flute - Suit
oOo
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